Funny Things to Say to Someone Getting a Colonoscopy

Undergoing a colonoscopy is no one’s idea of fun, but injecting a bit of humor can make the experience more bearable. 

Whether you’re trying to lighten the mood for a friend or loved one, or just looking to break the tension, a few well-placed jokes can go a long way. 

In this article, I’ll share some funny things to say to someone getting a colonoscopy, adding a touch of laughter to an otherwise daunting procedure.

Let’s dive in!

Funny Things to Say to Someone Getting a Colonoscopy

Funny Things to Say to Someone Getting a Colonoscopy
  1. “Let’s hope the doctor doesn’t find my keys in there!”
  1. “It’s just like a spa day for your colon.”
  1. “Smile! It’s the butt of all jokes.”
  1. “Remember to ask for the frequent flyer points.”
  1. “They say a colonoscopy a day keeps the doctor away. Just kidding.”
  1. “Time to get to the bottom of things!”
  1. “The camera adds 10 pounds, hopefully not to your colon.”
  1. “I hope they don’t find Narnia in there!”
  1. “Good news, you get to wear fancy medical fashion.”
  1. “Just think of it as extreme yoga.”
  1. “This is the one time you can brag about watching your diet.”
  1. “It’s like a rollercoaster ride for your intestines.”
  1. “Don’t worry, I’ve heard the snacks are good afterwards.”
  1. “Another day, another chance to moon the universe.”
  1. “If they find any gold in there, it’s mine!”
  1. “You’re going to have the cleanest pipes in town!”
  1. “Don’t forget to ask for the souvenir video.”
  1. “This gives a whole new meaning to the phrase ‘deep thinking.'”
  1. “Hope they don’t find last year’s Christmas dinner!”
  1. “Time for your colon to shine on the big screen.”
  1. “You’re about to have an ‘out-of-bum’ experience.”
  1. “Tell the doctor you want your colon’s autograph.”
  1. “Now you can say you’ve seen your insides and lived to tell the tale.”
  1. “Just think of it as rear-end maintenance.”
  1. “Hope they don’t bring back any weird souvenirs.”
  1. “Finally, a colonoscopy – your butt’s time to shine.”
  1. “The ultimate health gut check.”
  1. “Think of it as a butt adventure.”
  1. “Time to put your colon in the spotlight!”
  1. “It’s like Black Friday shopping for your colon.”
  1. “Your colon wants to become a movie star.”
  1. “You’re going to get the inside scoop on yourself!”
  1. “Time for the proctological paparazzi.”
  1. “Getting to the bottom of your number-two problem.”
  1. “A behind-the-scenes tour of your behind.”
  1. “Your colon gets its 15 minutes of fame.”
  1. “Get ready for a ‘tail’ of epic proportions.”
  1. “It’s the backstage pass to your body.”
  1. “They’re going to the depth of your bowels.”
  1. “Hope your colon studied for its close-up.”
  1. “Finally, a day where you salute your cheeks!”
  1. “It’s a colonoscopy, not a buttkicking competition.”
  1. “Your colon can’t wait for its curtain call.”
  1. “Take a bow, your colon’s star is shining bright.”
  1. “You’re a real trooper, it’s just a colonoscopy.”
  1. “Time for your intestines to put on a performance.”
  1. “Welcome to the world’s funnest colon experience.”
  1. “The ultimate colon appreciation exercise.”
  1. “A journey to the center of your gut.”
  1. “Your colon is about to become a celebrity!”

What to say to someone who is getting a colonoscopy?

  1. “You’re in good hands.”
  1. “Wishing you a smooth procedure.”
  1. “You’ve got this!”
  1. “Take care.”
  1. “You’ll do great!”
  1. “Sending positive vibes your way.”
  1. “Trust the process.”
  1. “Hoping for the best outcome.”
  1. “Stay strong.”
  1. “Get well soon.”
  1. “Thinking of you.”
  1. “You’re brave.”
  1. “Stay positive.”
  1. “You’ll be okay.”
  1. “Everything will go well.”
  1. “Good luck.”
  1. “Stay calm.”
  1. “You’ll get through this.”
  1. “Best wishes.”
  1. “Take it easy.”
  1. “We’re here for you.”
  1. “You’ll be back on your feet soon.”
  1. “Stay focused.”
  1. “All will be fine.”
  1. “Take a deep breath.”
  1. “We’ll be waiting to hear good news.”
  1. “Positive thoughts for you today.”
  1. “Be strong.”
  1. “You’ve got our support.”
  1. “Stay resilient.”

You can read funny things to Say in TTS, funny things to say to Karen, Funny things to Say on First Date, and funny to Say at a Celebration of Life.

How Can I Make My Colonoscopy Prep Fun?

  1. Create a Playlist: Compile your favorite songs to lift your spirits.
  1. Binge-Watch a Series: Watch that TV show you’ve been putting off.
  1. Pamper Yourself: Use a face mask or take a relaxing bath.
  1. Read a Good Book: Lose yourself in an engaging story.
  1. Try New Games: Play online or phone games to pass the time.
  1. Connect with Friends: Video call to catch up and distract yourself.
  1. Meditate: Use a meditation app to find your calm.
  1. Craft Time: Do some simple crafts like coloring or knitting.
  1. Listen to Podcasts: Find exciting podcasts on topics you enjoy.
  1. Cook Smooth Soups: Experiment with broth recipes for post-prep.
  1. Start a Journal: Write about your thoughts or future goals.
  1. Watch Comedy Specials: Enjoy stand-up comedy to laugh away stress.
  1. Puzzle Fun: Complete jigsaw puzzles or brain-teasers.
  1. Virtual Tours: Visit museums or places online.
  1. Plan a Trip: Sketch out your next vacation plan.
  1. DIY Projects: Simple projects can keep your hands and mind busy.
  1. Spa Day: At-home spa activities like foot soaks or manicures.
  1. Board Games: Play with family or friends.
  1. Online Shopping: Browse for future treats or essentials.
  1. Learn a Language: Use apps to pick up basic phrases in a new language.
  1. Online Courses: Enroll in free courses to learn something new.
  1. Listen to Audiobooks: Escape into different worlds with gripping reads.
  1. Organize Photos: Create albums of digital photos.
  1. Virtual Workout: Gentle exercises or stretching routines.
  1. Gardening Indoors: Tend to houseplants or start an indoor herb garden.
  1. Digital Art: Use an app to try drawing or digital painting.
  1. Social Media Fun: Engage in humorous or informative content.
  1. Light Reading: Magazines or short stories to keep it easy.
  1. Memory Lane: Go through old photo albums.
  1. Stay Comfy: Wear soft clothes and cozy up in your favorite blanket.

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