100+ Funny Response to “Don’t Let Bedbugs Bite”

Have you ever been told “Don’t let the bedbugs bite” right before you go to bed and wondered how to respond in a funny and witty way? 

It’s a common saying used at bedtime, and it’s usually just a playful way of wishing someone a good night’s sleep. 

So, in this article I’m going to show you some hilarious responses that you can use the next time someone tells you, “Don’t let the bedbugs bite!” 

Let’s begin!

100+ Funny Response to “Don’t Let Bedbugs Bite”

Funny Response to “Don’t Let Bedbugs Bite”

You can respond to these; I’ve trained them to bite only on command, too late, we’re planning a midnight feast, they’ve promised to nibble gently, they only bite on Tuesday; again “Don’t let bedbugs bite.”

  1. “I’ve trained them to bite only on command.”
  2. “And may your nightmares be filled with unicorns!”
  3. “Too late, we’re planning a midnight feast.”
  4. “I’ll try, but they’ve developed a taste for me.”
  5. “They’re my pets, they won’t bite me!”
  6. “I’ve trained them to sing lullabies instead!”
  7. “Will do, but the mosquitoes are another story.”
  8. “I’ve taught them to tango instead!”
  9. “They’ve promised to nibble gently.”
  10. “I’ve scheduled their dinner time, unfortunately it’s not bedtime.”
  11. “They only bite on Tuesdays.”
  12. “They’ve gone vegan, so I’m safe.”
  13. “Good thing, I’m not their type.”
  14. “Okay, but I can’t promise the same for the dust mites.”
  15. “I’ve been assured they only nibble.”
  16. “They’re on a strict diet—no humans after midnight.”
  17. “Biting is so last season, they’re into tickling now.”
  18. “But they promised me a good night kiss!”
  19. “They’re off duty after 10 PM.”
  20. “They’ve signed a peace treaty with me.”
  21. “They have braces now, biting is a challenge.”
  22. “I’ve given them a bedtime story, they’ll be asleep.”
  23. “They’re fasting today.”
  24. “Don’t worry, they’ve got dentures!”
  25. “They’re too busy watching late-night TV.”
  26. “I’ve switched them to a fruit diet.”
  27. “They only bite on full moon nights.”
  28. “They’re on strike for better working conditions.”
  29. “I’ve got them hooked on Netflix, they won’t bother.”
  30. “I’ve put them in their own tiny beds.”
  31. “They’re too busy tweeting.”
  32. “They’re on vacation this week.”
  33. “They promised not to bite if I let them watch cartoons.”
  34. “They’ve joined a non-violence movement.”
  35. “They’re attending yoga classes, too relaxed to bite.”
  36. “They’re too busy playing video games.”
  37. “I’ve enrolled them in a no-bite therapy.”
  38. “They’ve been instructed to give massages instead.”
  39. “I’ve got them on a strict no-human diet.”
  40. “They’re on a juice cleanse.”
  41. “I’ve got them on a leash, they won’t bother.”
  42. “They’re practicing social distancing.”
  43. “They’re in a meeting with the fleas.”
  44. “They’re too busy practicing their dance moves.”
  45. “I’ve got them hooked to Sudoku, they won’t bite.”
  46. “They’re working on their night cheese.”
  47. “They’re busy with their knitting.”
  48. “They’re on a sugar-free diet.”
  49. “They’re attending a motivational speech on ‘Not biting’.”
  50. “They’re busy updating their status on Facebook.”
  51. “They’ve migrated to the couch.”
  52. “I’ve set up a mini gym for them.”
  53. “They’re busy prepping for a marathon.”
  54. “They’re too busy planning their next holiday.”
  55. “They’re attending a Ted talk on ‘The Art of Not Biting’.”
  56. “They’re in a book club meeting.”
  57. “They’re busy painting their tiny little homes.”
  58. “They’re too scared of my teddy bear.”
  59. “They’re busy playing chess.”
  60. “They’re out partying.”
  61. “They’re busy planning their Halloween costumes.”
  62. “They’re busy practicing mindfulness.”
  63. “They’re singing karaoke.”
  64. “They’re busy playing pokemon go.”
  65. “They’re busy gossiping with the spiders.”
  66. “They’re learning a new language on Duolingo.”
  67. “I’ve set up a movie night for them.”
  68. “They’re too busy training for a tiny Olympics.”
  69. “They’ve joined a bite anonymous group.”
  70. “They’re busy playing hide and seek.”
  71. “They’re busy taking an online course on ‘How to stop biting’.”
  72. “They’re too busy with their pet flea.”
  73. “They’re too busy doing push-ups.”
  74. “They’re manifesting their dreams.”
  75. “I’ve introduced them to yoga, they’re pretty zen now.”
  76. “They’re on a no-bite diet.”
  77. “I’ve sent them to a sleepover at the neighbor’s.”
  78. “They’re in a meeting with the pillow.”
  79. “They’re too busy playing charades.”
  80. “They’re busy taking a Zumba class.”
  81. “They’re busy making TikTok videos.”
  82. “They’re too busy watching reality TV.”
  83. “They’re practicing their acting skills for a bedbug play.”
  84. “They’re on a Netflix binge.”
  85. “They’re in a meditation retreat.”
  86. “They’re too busy with their new hobby, knitting.”
  87. “They’re busy playing mini-golf.”
  88. “They’re attending a seminar on stress management.”
  89. “They’re too busy planning their next vacation to a bite-free destination.”
  90. “I’ve introduced them to the world of puzzles and they can’t get enough!”
  91. “They’re busy creating art with their non-biting hand.”
  92. “They’re too busy reading a book on how to break bad habits.”
  93. “They’ve joined a support group for chronic biters.”
  94. “They’re learning how to give themselves a manicure instead of biting their nails.”
  95. “They’re busy baking and decorating cookies instead of biting their fingers.”
  96. “I’ve taught them how to do a self-massage for stress relief.”
  97. “They’re too busy with their new passion for gardening.”
  98. “They’re watching cute animal videos to distract themselves from biting.”
  99. “They’ve started using fidget toys to keep their hands occupied.”
  100. “I’ve introduced them to the joy of bubble wrap popping as a healthier”

So, you can also check out the ways to respond You’re Making Me Blush, or Respond to a Declined Invitation

1. “I’ve trained them to bite only on command.”

It playfully suggests that you have control over the bedbugs, as if you’ve trained them like pets and can tell them when to bite or not to bite. It’s a way of saying, “Don’t worry, the bed bugs won’t bite you unless I tell them to,” which adds a note of humor to the goodnight wish.

2. “And may your nightmares be filled with unicorns!”

This playful reply suggests that if you’re going to have nightmares (typically filled with scary things), they might as well be filled with something as fantastical and harmless as unicorns. 

It’s a way of wishing someone a good night’s sleep, but with a touch of humor and imagination.

3. “Too late, we’re planning a midnight feast.”

The speaker is pretending that they’re organizing a late-night gathering with the bedbugs, as if these tiny pests were guests at a food party. 

This not only makes light of the old bedtime caution but also paints a humorous image that can elicit laughter.

4. “I’ll try, but they’ve developed a taste for me.”

The phrase essentially means that you are saying they’ll attempt to avoid the ‘bedbugs’ (which in this context, is a humorous reference to any minor annoyances or problems). 

However, they jokingly suggest that these ‘bed bugs’ have grown fond of bothering or ‘biting’ them, indicating that these issues keep coming back to them or are difficult to avoid.

5. “They’re my pets, they won’t bite me!”

It’s as if you are saying that the bedbugs are like your pets, and just like pets normally wouldn’t harm their owners, these ‘pet’ bedbugs wouldn’t bite you either. 

This funny response is a playful way to dismiss the old saying and maybe even a way to make going to bed seem less scary.

6. “I’ve trained them to sing lullabies instead!”

This funny answer suggests that instead of biting, you have taught the bedbugs to sing soothing songs, like lullabies, to help you sleep.

The idea of bedbugs singing instead of biting is really amusing. You can share this joke with friends at a sleepover or a camp to make them laugh.

Making a joke about bedbugs singing lullabies is a playful way to show that you’re not worried about little problems and can laugh about them.

7. “Will do, but the mosquitoes are another story.”

This response is funny because it takes the original saying about bedbugs, which are tiny bugs that might bite you in bed, and adds a twist by talking about mosquitoes, which are another type of bug that everyone knows can be really annoying, especially at night. 

It’s like you’re saying, “I might handle the bedbugs, but mosquitoes are a whole different problem!”

This joke could be great to share during summer or at a camp where mosquitoes are common. 

It’s a playful way to acknowledge that while you might avoid one problem, there’s always another funny or annoying challenge (like mosquitoes) waiting for you.

8. “I’ve taught them to tango instead!”

This funny answer suggests that instead of worrying about bedbugs biting, you’ve decided to teach them to dance the tango. 

It’s like saying you’ve made friends with the bedbugs and are having fun with them. 

This joke is great for making people laugh because it turns the idea of annoying bedbugs into something silly and unexpected. 

You can share this joke with friends to spread some giggles, especially when talking about bedtime or bugs.

9. They’ve promised to nibble gently.

This answer suggests that you’ve made a deal with the bedbugs where they can bite, but only a little bit. 

It’s like you’re pretending to have a friendly agreement with these tiny bugs. This joke could make people laugh because it’s silly to think of someone making a deal with bedbugs. 

You can share this joke with friends for a good laugh, especially when talking about sleeping or bugs. It’s a playful way to show you’re not too worried about little problems.

10. I’ve scheduled their dinner time, unfortunately it’s not bedtime.

It suggests that you have arranged a specific time to feed the bedbugs, but sadly, it’s not when you’re going to bed.

This response is like making a joke that you have bugs as pets and you’ve set a dinner time for them, just like you would for a pet dog or cat. 

But the twist is, their dinner time isn’t at bedtime, so they might still bite you when you’re sleeping.

This kind of joke is great for making people laugh because it’s unexpected and a bit silly. 

You can use this joke to lighten the mood and get a few chuckles in a casual setting like a sleepover or a camp.

11. They’re in a meeting with the pillow.

Instead of worrying about bedbugs, you imagine them as tiny creatures having a serious meeting with your pillow. 

It’s like you’re turning the bugs into characters in a story, having an important discussion with another part of your bed. 

This joke can make people laugh because it’s a creative and silly way to think about something that’s usually seen as a nuisance. 

You can share this joke with friends at sleepovers or in casual conversations to add a bit of fun and imagination.”

12. They’re too busy playing charades.

This humorous response means you’re pretending the bedbugs are too busy playing a game to bite you. 

It’s like saying the bugs are having their own fun and forgetting to bother you. 

This joke is great for making friends laugh, especially when you’re at a sleepover or a night party.

13. They’re busy taking a Zumba class.

This answer is about the fact that the bedbugs are too occupied with dancing in a Zumba class to bother biting you.

The thought of bedbugs doing Zumba, which is a lively dance fitness program, is quite amusing. You can use this joke among friends or at a sleepover to make everyone laugh.

This joke turns the idea of bedbugs into something silly and light-hearted, showing that you can make a joke out of a common saying.

14. They’re busy making TikTok videos.

“Tell them you’re too busy making TikTok videos to worry about bedbugs” is a humorous way to respond to the old saying “don’t let the bedbugs bite.” 

It’s like saying you’re too involved in something cool and modern to bother with old problems like bedbugs. 

This joke can be a hit among friends, especially those who know how popular and engaging making TikTok videos can be. 

15. They’re too busy watching reality TV.

It’s like saying you’re too distracted by the fun and drama on TV to pay attention to anything else, even bedbugs.

This response is a playful way to show that you’re more interested in the entertaining world of reality TV than in old sayings about bugs. 

It’s a joke that could make your friends laugh, especially if they know how much you enjoy watching these shows. 

You can use this joke at a sleepover or a casual get-together to add some humor to the conversation.

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